Category Archives: Uncategorized

Here one for you:

My son and I are in the entry way of school looking at a display.

This was awhile ago, but popped back into my head this morning.

This lady comes up to us and says, “You better enjoy that now, because they are taking all the red 40 out of foods. And they should because red 40 causes cancer. Some stores already don’t sell foods with red 40 and in Europe they are illegal.”

For a few moments, I just stare at her. She is around my age, has freckles, and is petite. I know her from 4-H, but her family quit because they had too much going on. I’ve found her to be friendly, in the past, and I don’t think she’s being unfriendly now.

Meanwhile, my son doesn’t even pause on eating Red Hot Cheetos. We make eye contact, at various, points within the lady’s public service announcement (which was much longer than what I’ve provided here today).

I feel neither sad nor mad….just curious as to what motivated this particular share of words.

Later, I would reflect on this and consider that they way she was talking to my son and I was more like the way people talk to the TV during a football game, stating tips and lamenting plays without any possibility of the TV talking back.

Anyway, Sam shrugged and said, “Well, I’m still going to eat these.”

For my part, I tried to change the topic.

“Well, it’s always good to care about our health. How are things going with you guys?”

She gave a one or two word answer and walked away at a clip.

Happy Labor Day!

Love,

Terra Rose

I’ve heard this said in more than one than one place, “It’s simple, but it’s not easy.” I wanted to add that to what I wrote yesterday. When you or someone your care about is struggling depression, if feels terrible and getting started on changing daily behaviors is incredibly difficult. Ease back into healthy behaviors as best you can without speaking to yourself harshly or, if it’s a loved one, be supportive of small positive changes.

What I’d most like to see change for mental health, as a field, is that there would be a greater focus on connecting with loved ones and community. At the same time, there would be a shift away from or little focus on, “What caused me to be this way?”

For one thing, there is no one specific cause. Mental health is multi-factored. You can use this word to remember the factors: Biopsychosocial. (This is a much longer speech that I will just say briefly here). Biological factors are genetics, drinking water, nutrition, exercise, PMS, sleep, and more. Psychological factors involves the way you think about things. Social factors are the people in your life. My best understanding of mental healthcare means addressing biological, psychological, and social factors.

For the middle part, psychological factors, developing your ability to notice your thoughts is key. Example: You see a pile of papers and crayons on the floor. That part is a fact. Next, thoughts come in. You think, “I told those kids to pick up after they were done. [still a fact] They don’t respect me.”

The thought: “They don’t respect me” is not a fact at all. It’s a thought.

It can be helpful to imagine your thoughts are items on a shelf at the store. When I close my eyes, I usually see a bunch of shampoo bottles with various thoughts on them. It not my choice which thoughts are on the shelf. Those thoughts are there and it’s up to me to choose which ones I put into my shopping cart. If I pick up, “They don’t respect me” and put it in my cart how will I feel?

I could leave, “they don’t respect me” on the shelf and pick-up, “they need me to coach them on the life skill of keeping a house clean” and/or “if they aren’t able to do it, I can reduce the amount of items they take out.”

When I pick-up a thought about coaching skills and having the power to make my own life easier by reducing the items in the house, I feel more peaceful. So, that is the thought to pick-up and put in my cart and buy.

I learned that from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) which is in my top three favorites.

Well, I’m going to the Farmer’s Market and then, tonight, a fireworks place is showing off all the fireworks they have for sale for 4th of July. I learned about this June fireworks display a week too late last year. This year I’m in!

Wishing you..Love, Hope, and Peace,

Terra Rose

Behavioral activation is VERY important to mental health. There is a deeply false belief that we have to feel like doing things in order to do them. I hear this one from many people and I’ve thought it myself quite a bit in the past. The thought is something like, “I don’t feel like it. I’ll wait until I feel better.”

Sometimes, if you’re sick…like throwing up or you broke a bone or you just gave birth or had surgery…this might be true. You may need some time to rest and you will “feel like it” once again after your body recovers.

More often though, you just aren’t ever going to “feel like it.”

If I had a quarter for every time I did I thing I didn’t feel like it, I’d be like Scrooge McDuck swimming in a giant quarter filled pool. And I’m in no way shape or form the most productive person I know.

I have a lot more to say about this, but it’s time to clean. Spoiler: I do not feel like it.

Love,

Terra Rose

This is a good song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jNm_wrWquPs

I got into work early and put this one on my computer. I shut my door and danced. Well, I guess I mostly jumped and swung my arms.

I’m lucky to have these spaces for fun in my day.

There’s room for joy.

I remember this at past jobs, too. Like how I could give my friends the leftover fries when I worked at J.R.’s Pizza. Or how I could have one free drink at the end of my shift, after I turned 21. I used to get hot chocolate and bailey’s Irish cream. At college, I would bring the chicken patties that were going to go into the garbage to my dorm.

Okay, MOST of my joy is free stuff!

It’s also movement. Running, swimming, dancing.

Being sad is a default, and while we need to have space for sadness, there is a difference between crying while you keep doing meaningful activities and becoming stuck.

Don’t say that you’ll wait until you feel better to do the things!

Don’t wait.

Love,

Terra Rose

I’ve gotten two emails and have walked by multiple posters at school reminding students and parents about the importance of attending school.

My best guess is that years of telling everyone to stay home when they’re sick is starting to backfire. It’s hard for the kids and the parents to know what to do anymore. Back in my day….I get to say that now because I’m over 40…we just went to school with runny nose or cough. Pretty much, you’d go to school unless you were throwing up or you had a high fever.

I started reading this recently: “ThePost-Traumatic-Growth
Guidebook by Arielle Schwartz, PhD”

I’ll let you know how it goes, but so far some good material about how everyday actions add up to resilience.

Today is my first day back to work on Mondays. I had Mondays off for the summer, because I am contracted with provide therapy/mental health services at a school on Mondays. It’s challenging for me, but hard to explain why. I think it’s the absence of co-workers. Even though I don’t see my co-workers a ton throughout my workday anyway, it still helps to see them for a few minutes at the start and end of the day.

In my third year here, I’m getting to know a couple of the teachers and the school counselor is always helpful with finding the least disruptive times to pull the kids out of class. I remember telling a relative that I was working at a school and she had said, “You’re taking them out of class?!” I’m taking them out of class the least amount to meet the need. These aren’t the kids that are rocking it academically or behaviorally. The goal of therapy is that mental health symptoms go down and functioning at school and home goes up.

Well, that’s a random bit of info about what I’m doing today.

Last but not least, today marks 18 years of marriage for me and an awesome person!!!!

Hope your day is going well 🙂

Love,

Terra Rose

Sometimes, people actually know and say the things they should do. There’s this whole phase where people talk and talk about their plans or tasks before doing them. I do this as much as anyone else.

My mom wrote this prayer for us:

“I love You, God.

Thank You, Jesus

Come Holy Spirit.

Reinforce my strengths.

Strengthen my weaknesses.

Make me stronger.”

I hear people saying what they know they should do, and my thought is like a heartbeat.

Then,

Do

it

Then, do it. Then do it. Then do it.

All I can do is reel myself back into myself. What is within my control? What can I do to help? Is there an obstacle that I can’t see? Are there other supports I can refer to?

I guess if my biggest gripe is that I don’t like listening to people say the right things and then not do them, my life is pretty darn good. I can choose to drink water and sit with posture that good for my body. I can run or swim outside of work. I can cook healthy food for my family.

I can pray.

Love,

Terra Rose

Last year and the year before that, I noticed a patten this time of year. People typically forget therapy appointments the week school gets out. This past January, I decided I would take the first week off in June this year.

So, here I am.

I’m trying not to think up new ways to stress myself out. Faced with a few days in a row without my regular work schedule, the possibilities dance around in a way that I imagine some people find pleasant.

For today:

1). Wash and fold clothes

2). Make bed

3). Run 4 miles

4). Drink my water bottle (64 oz)

5). Since it’s Saturday, skip bossing everyone around you. (I am going to boss everyone on Sunday though-fair warning!)

6). Write

7). Plant basil, cilantro, and sunflowers at the new house

8). Think about nothing as much as possible

9). Pray

These aren’t in any kind of order.

We went to State Track and Field meet yesterday. This was a whole thing with literally running from the parking spot to the stands to be there in time to see my nephew run. I’m glad we made it! He did great!!!

Happy Saturday 🙂

Love,

Terra Rose

My last resolution for the new year is skills improvement. Right now, its mostly about where to find items, turning on dome lights/oxygen/how to replace the oxygen tank, and also the paperwork. I’ve made some good improvement on the paperwork since January. I think the key to getting better at all of these skills is repetition.

At least, that’s what it’s been here at the mental health clinic. Repetition. I’ve been able to streamline the intake process and ask the assessment questions confidently now. Sadly, the secret seems to be wearing myself out. There’s just nothing left to be nervous with when you work alot of hours.

People seem to like the worn out version of me.

Confidence comes from using up every last bit energy. Until all that’s left to share is the truth: that all people are worth the same amount. Not more, not less.

And we should all be drinking more water!

Wishing you moments of joy and peace.

Love,

Terra Rose